Wednesday, September 19, 2018

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Saturday, August 18, 2018

Manners & Etiquette For Success


Want to get ahead in life? Of course, you do we all do right? Well, learn the art of getting noticed. Learn to speak well for starters. In our busy lives, we hardly get time to think about evaluating ourselves on any serious level. We tend to just go! We have our basic "yes thank you" or "no thanks" and of course "excuse me", but everybody does that. You won't stand out with that alone.

Do you think you could improve your basic manners? Do you think its important?

Do you even care at this point? What difference does it make right? We're all labeled and tagged before the first words come out of our mouths anyway, right? Especially with racism on the rise, right? Well, it does make a difference and could even be the deciding factor in such matters as getting hired or being invited to places where you could meet people ready to help you move your life forward.

Manners and etiquette are very important. Mastering the English language is important if you want to develop your manners and etiquette. I'd begin there since English has become the primary language of the world, it's a good place to work from, don't you think?

The truth is, most people are not concerned about manners & etiquette at this time in the world. And, that actually makes this a good time for you to get good at them.

Because as you know, what's in today is out tomorrow and what's out always comes back in. Even racism as you've seen with the Trump presidency. But I believe in the best of us and think most people actually do the exact opposite.

What goes around comes around. For a man to improve the status of his existence he must kill off the bad stuff he sends around town so to speak.

So, all the crude behavior's you're witnessing today will be gone tomorrow and tomorrow will usher in a whole new discourse. Discourse is powerful and should be carefully planned so as not to put hurtful things out there.

People tend to take what their leaders say as God's ice cream! And though that is completely unsafe because (gods don't have to go to the bathroom) they often choose unsavory as their favorite flavor. Leaders are just people. People you trust to lead and make the higher decisions. People you put in place to do the right things by you socially and economically. But, unfortunately, there are those who still choose the unsavory as their favorite flavor. These guys have to drop a turd just like the rest of us and with that image in mind, most of us arent' buying into that status quo anymore because it's rigged from top to bottom, from day one to present day. And every human will shit on himself at least once in his lifetime. More than that for some. Including the great influencers, lol.

The influencer will vote oligarchs and rich people forgetting these people don't care about them on a human level!

But manners and etiquette are proof you are not aspiring to be unsociable or harbor some anti-respect towards intelligence, even if you did vote uninformed and actually set things back for yourself, the country and the world. I'm not going to lie to you, the world is in a very bad place right now and only worse things will come of it.

But keep using your manners. In fact, great manners not only open up opportunities for us to excel by invitation, meaning more people are apt to invite you to something that benefits you, but they also teach us to strive for higher learning and more knowledge about life and people. And of course, that's bullshit! They're so many people fucked up right now, they don't know their ass from a hole in the ground.

That, being since we already show our respect for others, then others can't see how fucked up our thinking is right now.

Overall respect for your fellow man only increases respect for yourself. And respect for yourself maintains steadfastness or sobriety and sobriety helps us stay alert for increases in our lives or our status in life.

When you add good manners and etiquettes to that mix, you come out a winner any way you look at it!

Self-respect can take you a very long way while at the same time it asks others to respect you. And when you have respect you have success, at least in theory.

Good manners and etiquette are a part of the humility family. Humility allows others to approach you.

Otherwise, they'll hesitate due to the inability to determine your intelligence, disposition or that mean look, you keep on your face.

No one wants to approach someone who appears threatening, selfish, and mean.

Some people carry a demeanor like a warning to others that says they've judged you, they don't have time for you, they're better than you, or you are not acceptable to them. Been a lot that lately.

In response to that people will automatically deem that individual as not acceptable to them.
You'll only get back from life what you put out there!

And there you go, another door closed to you. But, you asked for it, by your poor manners.

You can't live in a world where all the doors are closed and locked to you. And like I said above, what goes around comes around and when you close doors, they are closed to you. How are you going to survive? You closed the door first!

So manners and etiquette are a big part of the essentials for a life of opportunity and success!

It is disarming when we are in the presence of a person who wants to see the best for us. A person who is thinking of us. Some who is not like the others.

They won't say no to anything, they trust you, will do the right thing by you. They believe in you. No is not a good word and nobody wants to hear it.

Most people choose a course in their life. Not choosing a course is the same as choosing the course your life takes.

Why should I say no to someone unless what they propose is harmful to me?

Unless its a child requesting something harmful to themselves, I just say "sure".

Sure, yes, please, thank you, can I help, are so nice to hear among us. One begets the other.

A request that is responded to with a yes almost always comes back with a gift that screams "I'm here because of the goodness and kindness that's in your heart.

Have you noticed how really rich people have great manners (most do)? Most won't say no. People who say no a lot are generally controlling and like the feeling of having power over you or just being in charge. So usually, their just assholes.

I don't like to think I'm running anything, and that's even when I am officially in charge. I'd rather think I have the skills to motivate people to do a good job of running things for me. I have enough sense to know its the presence and input of others that make things run well in my life, for me, around me or by me. So I respect and trust in others to be achievers. Their color has nothing to do with it.

But to each his own, to each his own life and to each his own road and to each his own results! Which is exactly what we get in life.

In a leadership position, great manners and good etiquette are the crowns you wear on your head, and the balance in your life is the pendants you were around your neck.

They precede you when you walk into a room. And, they set the stage for how you will be received in that room.

If you are a person of love for his fellow man others can feel it. We all struggling with something or the other, that's just life resisting our personal projects. People know when someone is out of sync.

So get in the habit of saying yes, of judging others by their character, and yourself by how many people you help up to a better life.

It doesn't mean you're being a fool or excepting of everything. It means you understand life.

I personally am accepting of only a few things. But I also know that without others I don't have the power to change anything!

We all know that most of what happens in the world and among us is unacceptable. The world is a lemon tree orchard more often than not. So let people make their lemon aid. Don't stand in the way of that.

It means you are about the bigger picture that they have for their life. Unless you're kissing someone's ass who is leading you astray, you should know better.

That you know that in order to have a sweet life one must learn to make lemonade with all the lemons in life.

So I'm all for just treating everybody nice, practicing respect, manners, and good etiquette with them and all the while supporting the effort they're giving their life. Everyone is desperate about something they're not willing to discuss with you.

Support the dreams of others "actively". Actually do things for them. You have to if you want their attention and for them to think good things about you. After all, it's just good etiquette.

Thanks



     

Tuesday, July 24, 2018

Vulnerability


Do you feel vulnerable? Ever notice how some people put on the hard shell or carry an image that says I'm tough I'm mean, I don't like you, or I don't care. Others exuberate indifference, or emanate from a vibe that says you are not good enough for me. I'm better than you or what are you looking at?  Many people have been hurt because they chose to be nice, kind, thoughtful, or allowed someone to come close or to get in.  At one point in the past, maybe it was a relationship, a friendship or a relative, and the result was abuse, neglect, being misunderstood, cheated on, or attacked, so they retracted their feelings and any display of emotion. The person or people who treated you this way was wrong and have a problem which will confront them one day, one that will eventually cause them great shame and much pain. I assure you it will be a lesson they wish they could have avoided. But what about you? You, have become a victim who has pulled their head and heart back into a shell like a turtle, or put them in a hole in the ground like an ostrich to protect them, and as a result, hidden yourself from life's most rewarding gift, the gift of love, companionship, rewarding relationships, a healthy social life and true emotional exchange.

Please listen, you cannot live your life as a result of what others have done to you, not and enjoy it. I know. I've tried it and it only caused me more suffering. What was so bad about it is that I didn't know the cause of my suffering, which was in a word the loss of joy in my life, a secret loneliness? I took the little things for granted that came into my life. Things that were sweet and nice, or a gift to me in some small way that I couldn't fully appreciate. I only knew to keep moving straight ahead, to play it safe, keep myself hidden, to avoid embracing anything or anyone. I refused to trust life but for myself and often not even myself. I was always checking the parameters, going over decisions I made or my thinking towards a decision.  As a result of this kind of over protective behavior acquaintances with others was shallow and unfulfilling. I became a closet loner, popular when among friends, but solitary otherwise. I believed this was the best way to be, that it kept my life protected. Well, it was not healthy, and living this way cultivated loneliness, a judgmental attitude and an emptiness in my life which went unfulfilled.

You are not living life to the fullest if you are not opening up your heart and letting it make some choices and decisions. I know it is risky, but when you stop and think about it, everything in your life is a risk, especially those things which can bring you the most joy. You cannot shut one part of your heart down without the whole heart shutting down. If you close one door in your heart and think you've done yourself a favor and protected the area where pain got in, it will actually shut out joy from the rest of your heart. You cannot segment one part of your heart without adversely affecting your whole heart. Joy is living and loving life, God, and the people around you with ALL your heart. Go back to being you, regardless of any bad experiences you've had from thoughtless people. This is how life's most valuable rewards are found and kept. Try it and watch how beautiful people become attracted to you and you to them. Start changing your life and those around you with this powerful truth now.

Friday, October 16, 2015

Ten Things That Anger People Most

A person's mood determines what will anger them and to what extent that anger will go. It's just human nature. By that, anything can raise our blood pressure or makes us temporarily insane? I have a love-hate relationship with everyone, especially when driving. Sound familiar? I go insane having to wait at signal lights when there's no traffic🚗. Most people probably don't go around looking for a button they can push to anger you accept for maybe the teeny minded racist among us. Although there are people who will look for ways to get one-up on you for the fun of it. But, that can actually be healthy competition among friends. Friends do that all the time for the fun of it.

Generally, friends won't push your buttons other than to get a rise out of you. But siblings will. Sometimes just because they know where those buttons are. At least until they grow up anyway. Parents sometimes push their child's buttons just for the fun of it, although they shouldn't. Because it's bullying. But some parents will push your buttons if they feel as though they've run out of ways to motivate you. People know instinctively what's right and what's wrong. Some will try and deny it if you listen to them. And most will try to blame something or someone else for their mistakes if possible, that too is human nature. Some will even blame you for their bad treatment of you. It's like they've judged you and sentenced  you. It's wrong, but people do it. Unless you're holding a gun to someone's head you can't make them do anything. We have to take responsibility for our own actions, wrongdoings, and mistakes so we keep moving in the right direction.  

We have choices and free will and it's easy to abuse them. We make mistakes, yes but free will can become self-abuse. Even when you live by a higher standard of living you're still going to make mistakes. If you've learned some rules that work for you, make them personal rules that you don't break. That's what I do anyway.

People will intentionally try and rattle you on the down-low, and of course, you mustn't let them rattle you. People fall into the hater's category quite easily these days. Venting on others is popular among homo sapiens. Venting to others is much more effective. Haters and trouble makers are immature individuals, aren't they? They are little mini-minded terrorists ignorant of the rule that what goes around comes back around. Haters are very unhappy people and they want you to be unhappy too. This behavior by the way; is the reason they are locked in a perpetual cycle of unhappiness. So, here again, what goes around, does come back around.

Anger will wreck you
So what is my point?

It's to get you to think about yourself as a person and how you live. And, if applicable to you, to get you to check yourself before you wreck yourself. Because anger, even in it's simplest form is destructive to us mentally and internally. The world's not going to change unless you change it. We live in tall grass, and there are snakes in the grass. That's just the simple truth. These snakes will do the unthinkable to cause you pain and suffering and yes that is a truth about homo sapien. But sometimes we do the unthinkable to ourselves. What is the unthinkable? The unthinkable is getting mad. When you let anger drive you, your thoughts and your emotions become unstable. We become possessed and begin to give up our power.

Here are a few irritable things that can open the door to anger:
  1. Being accused of something you didn't do.
  2. Working hard to achieve a goal and learn you're being under minded. 
  3. Being ignored by someone you care about because they've been brainwashed against you by someone else. 
  4. Driving in traffic when you're up against a deadline. (a primal animal panic instinct)
  5. When there is a double standard; one for you and one for someone being given more than you. 
  6. When someone snatches your blanket off of you to wake you up🩲! This can be the start of a pretty bad day.  
  7. When your WiFi stops working or slows way down as you're working with a deadline
  8. Being betrayed by a friend. Your mate cheats on you. 
  9. Someone does to you what you did to them. 
  10. Finding out you're being used.   

So what does this list tell you? Does it tell you that humiliation is generally what pushes a person's buttons? But it's not only people that cause humiliation. An event can occur that will humiliate you, like tripping and falling. Do you get mad about that? Depends on your mood, right?  
Protect your joy-reject anger

What's your takeaway from this blog post, your "people truth? I'd like it to be that anger is a weakness, your Achilles heel. The "I submit button". Your tap out! But, hey I'm just discussing what angers people most. Devious people will use what angers people most against you. "So stay cool, if you can be strong then be strong. Because getting even is more fun".  I made that up, lol. Because not being effected, not trying to get even is very effective🎈 Sometimes anger comes over us no matter how good we are at staying cool. Remember I told you we're not perfect. But people who have a habit of getting angry are suffering from something. If you look close, they're suffering from a disorder and we all have it. So just ignore it. Get good at cooling yourself off quickly if you're the type that angers. Some homo sapiens don't have the anger gene. I wish I was like them. What if someone deliberately kills your dog? Could you stay cool as you work through it?

Even if you're a champion at keeping your cool, I think that would set you off.  My point is there are times when anger is justified. But like everything, there is a solution. And that is: Get hold of yourself as quickly as possible. That's how you overcome an attack on your integrity and come out victorious. 

So again, people will push your buttons just because they can and some will do it because they are wicked. And some of them will succeed at pissing you off, but don't let it take hold. Come to grips with your anger and relinquish it immediately. Anger doesn't do you any good. It's a tempting adrenaline release, but for all the wrong reasons. Anger does little good in 99.9% of the matters you find yourself angry about. It's better to keep your cool, wait for the opportunity and diplomatically bring your aggressor face to face with their own behavior. They hate that. And, it works every time. Name ten things that anger you most and post them in the comments🎈  It will vent them!